Normal slave life continues

Last week was an interesting contrast between feeling a certain freedom -- being by itself in a big city abroad, exploring and experiencing what it has to offer, going its own way -- and simultaneously feeling owned, kept horny and feeling very frustrated, and thinking about its life as a slave, not in control, focused on service, made available for use to others by its Master, living for their pleasure.

And now that it is back home, it is with aching sensitive balls, weighed down by the permanent ball weight, and a cock ring that pushes back on every erection in a frustrating way, that the slave knows it is back in its normal day-to-day existence as a slave. Next week the continuation of its weekday evening training sessions by its Master, and booked for a loan out to SIR.

The loan outs may be horny or difficult or both, but what is fulfilling is how they always confirm its position as a slave and its purpose of serving Master and others. It has been a theme in the slave's mind the past week as well, as it was seeing a wide variety of men and imagined what it would be like to be made to serve them. It experiences ever more strongly that this is truly its life now. Loaned out as Master sees fit, to whoever He wants, regardless of what the slave may want. Subjugated to whatever happens to be a horny or amusing way for them to use it. Always uncertain what difficulties, suffering or humiliations it might face. Expected by its Master to deal with those, work on overcoming resistances it may experience, and to place its users' pleasures first.

A life that makes it at times very nervous but also fuels its desires, and ambitions for the challenges ahead and the expansion of its capabilities. Because in the end, that surrender and submission is what some deep part within needs.